9am: all the sounds changed. The midwife had only been her a few minutes, was setting up a few things, and it all changed. The fear about my babies position was gone and I alternated standing and sitting in my room through loud moans. My parents arrived, and the whirl wind began. I laid in my bed and found that I had progressed another cm (in the 20min she had been there) and was fully effaced and our baby had dropped very low. Eloisa wasn’t going any where. This baby was coming today! Charlie and my Dad moved the birth tub into my bedroom and began to fill it. My Mom played with Nolie in her room and they began to figure out the plans for the (what we thought would be, a long day ahead of them). The tub was filling. I was getting louder. This was, most definitely, It.
9:30am: My mom offered me a hug “can I hug you goodbye?” and I declined. Charlie knew it would be soon. The midwives all had knowing looks. And I looked desperately at Charlie and said “I don’t think I can do this for another six hours.”
9:45: I finally aquiest to our doula being called to arrive. Because this is the first time I think “I don’t know if I can do this.”
9:55: “I feel like I am pushing!” My body began to open up. And just… roar. It didn’t feel like pushing, it wasn’t guided or instructed. It was strange, and huge, and loud, and I couldn’t run away from it. And I just kept opening up and then having this blissful break.
10:05: ” I don’t think I can do this!”
“This is normal. This is how you get the baby out and into your ams. You ARE doing this. This is normal.”
10:06: “reach down! your baby is here!”
And everything was new again.